Sunday, 29 April 2012

Weeing in the bath!

My stress levels this week have been sky high.  What with ex-husbands, divorce issues and poorly kids,  it's been pretty horrific.  After a few to many glasses of wine last night, followed by a trip to the supermarket with two kids in the pouring rain things weren't getting to much better.  My head was pounding.

With dinner out the way and a rainy afternoon stretching in front of me, I settled the kids in front of the TV with a DVD and load of toys nearby to keep them entertained. I sneaked upstairs for a much longed for relaxing soak in the bath. I turned on the taps, added loads of lovely bubble bath and waited for the patter of feet to come bounding up the stairs.  There was nothing but the sound of them playing and laughing.  Result! I had got away with part 1. With some nice chill out music my treat was complete. I sank into the boiling hot water, beneath the bubbles and closed my eyes.  Bliss! For 2 seconds anyway. 

My heart stopped when I heard the sound of someone coming up with stairs.
"Mummy, where are you?" shouted Charlie.
"I've run away." came me reply.
"ohh mummy no you haven't you are in the bath.  Faye! Faye! mummy's in the baaatttthhhh." came the shout from Charlie.
"Im getting in, I'm getting in." they shouted.
"No way" I shouted "Go away for five minutes and leave me alone." 

Yeah right, as if that was ever going to happen.  They hung around the side of the bath splashing me with water and shoving bubbles in my face.  Thanks Kids.  They thankfully soon got bored of that and disappeared.  Finally! I closed my eyes again.  I should have known better the sounds of, come and do the conga, blasted from Faye's bedroom.  You have got to be kidding me!

OK, things were not going according to plan, but if a slid further under the water I could drown out the world and pretend I was alone for a few minutes. I had slipped under the water when I felt something plop into the bath.  Followed by another plop and yet another.  Feeling around in the water.  I was horrified to find that they were now throwing plastic snakes, cockroaches and spiders in.  "Your in big, big, massive trouble when I get out this bath" I shouted but the sound of giggles filled the air, before a huge dinosaur came flying towards me.  "Arrgggh, one, two, three ..."

Before I knew what was happening, Charlie had decided he could wait no longer and clambered into the bath, naked except for his socks.
 "taadaa," he proclaimed "I'm in mummy". 
"hmmm, I can see that Charlie"
"haahaa," he laughed "I'm gonna wee in your bath"
"Don't you dare .." but it was to late
"I have mummy, I really have."
"Chaaarrrliiieee," I screeched, before grabbing my towel and storming out the bathroom.  I should have known better to think that I could get away that, I really should. 

The only bonus to the whole escapade is that they have their PJ's on before 5pm and it will be a very early night for them.  Haha, There is a god!

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